Tuesday, January 17, 2006

What if?

January 23rd is when ALA will announce the Caldecott award for 2005...

Now the chances of me winning one on my first try with a small publisher gets pretty astronomical, but hey, there have been dark horses who've won (I'm left going "How am I going to get THAT?!")

So... I want it on the record here on my blog that if I win the Caldecott I will...

  1. Call Mike and scream incoherently causing him to believe that though I haven't been pregnant, I am somehow giving birth to triplets...
  2. Call my parents and scream, but somehow the sound of their voice will reach the recesses of my mind and I will calm enough to explain that I won a freakin' medal
  3. Call Miriam at Blooming Tree in case she doesn't know and tell her first to take a Bayer, then when I have confirmation that she's taken medication, I'll let her have the good news and hope someone can revive her
  4. If I'm at work, I will stand on the customer service desk, hit the all page on my mobile store phone, and launch into an acceptance speech that Cuba Gooding Jr would be proud of, complete with tears, runny nose and hysterical laughter
  5. If #4 doesn't get me fired, I'd probably quit. The Caldecott isn't really a cash prize, but it's an instant career maker
  6. After quitting or being fired or given forced vacation, I would go get a pint of gelato, preferably the chocolate nutty flavor, and I would go get Mike who I realize has been trying to call me since I hung up on him.
  7. Mike insists on driving given my state. He drives us to our favorite Sushi restaurant and we blow my paycheck on our favorite sushi (which we'll find out later clashed with the gelato)
  8. Somehow the news crews track us to the Sushi restaurant, but I'm embarrassed to be seen with 8 empty boats that held 112 pieces of sushi, so we duck out the back.
  9. We go down to 6th street and find a kareokee bar and sing "Everybunny was Kung Fu Fighting" till we loose our voices. Our friends have heard about it and called Mike so they join us and everyone buys me a round of drinks.
  10. I'm talked out of getting a Caldecott Medal tattooed on my butt and taken to an all night diner for coffee and sober up food.
  11. I'm tucked into bed, but I'm too excited to sleep. I start calling random people in the middle of the night, and they all feign excitement but really they just want to go back to sleep.
  12. I finally go to sleep, I don't dream because I'd just lived my dream (ahhhh....)


tem2 said...

I'll be listening for your name!

Anonymous said...

When you wish upon a star your dreams come true.
Jiminey C.

Don Tate II said...

Best of luck, ha-ha-ha!